Next week I get the keys to rent my first ‘grown-up’ apartment, after years of roommates and a tiny studio flat. I’m so excited, it feels like a real milestone, and it got me thinking about adulthood, and how it isn’t always so easy to figure out. When I was younger, I thought I would know for sure when I was grown up – I would reach some birthday, and everything would be figured out.
But here I am, nearly 29 now, and I know it’s not so simple. I moved an ocean away from home and built a life here in LA, but I still feel like I should get gold stars when I pay a bill or eat my vegetables (instead of just eating dessert for dinner :). Adulthood comes in fits and starts, and sometimes, it’s nothing we can predict: it can be taking responsibility for someone else for the first time, a child or parent; owning your mistakes, or simply making the hard choice you know is right for you, no matter what the cost.
In Unconditional, Carina is 26, older than any of my other heroines. All around her, her friends have settled down, they have homes, and husbands, and are starting their families, and she finds herself back at square one trying to figure out her life from scratch again. Writing her story made me realize again how there’s no one path we’re supposed to walk: adulthood is messy and confusing, and your life may not look like the people’s around you — or anything resembling the image you had in your mind.
But that’s OK. Everyone has their own journey, and sometimes the most important thing to remember is that it’s never too late to start again: to choose what you really want out of life and go for it. Be brave, know yourself, and sometimes, once in a while, eat dessert for dinner 🙂